


Toph Beifong's List of Genetically Acceptable Baby Daddies

by Philosopher_King



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Aromantic Toph, Crack, F/M, Gen, Toph wants kids but no romantic entanglements, What's a world's greatest earthbender to do?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-09
Updated: 2020-05-09
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:14:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 179
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24091165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Philosopher_King/pseuds/Philosopher_King
Summary: What it says on the tin, with pros and cons of each.
Relationships: Toph Beifong/Everyone
Comments: 25
Kudos: 192





	Toph Beifong's List of Genetically Acceptable Baby Daddies

**Author's Note:**

  * For [guileheroine](https://archiveofourown.org/users/guileheroine/gifts).



> Canonically, we know that Toph had children with two different men, neither of whom stayed around. I headcanon that she's aromantic but knew she wanted children. So, what if she took a scientific approach to the problem?
> 
> As Chief of Republic City Police, I assume Toph found a way to read and write, possibly involving special ink containing minerals or metal that she can sense.

**~~Aang~~ **

Pros:

  1. He's the fucking Avatar.



Cons:

  1. Flighty (literally)
  2. Indecisive
  3. Dumb sense of humor
  4. Airbender kid would be a dead giveaway. Political and PR nightmare. Prohibitive.



**Zuko**

Pros:

  1. Never got that field trip
  2. Probably good in bed
  3. Sighted people all think he's hot—good for reproductive success of offspring.



Cons:

  1. Volatile temper
  2. Emotionally needy
  3. Family history of mental instability and general shittiness
  4. High probability of firebending offspring. Could I train a firebender? Possibly, but strong preference for earthbender (obviously).



(Consider attempting field trip without souvenirs.)

**Sokka**

Pros:

  1. Yum
  2. Smart
  3. Funny
  4. Good at plans



Cons:

  1. Bad at drawing (apparently)
  2. Some chance of waterbender kid; not a dealbreaker.



**Satoru**

Pros:

  1. YUM
  2. Smart
  3. Inventive
  4. Did I mention smart?



Cons:

  1. Works for my dad
  2. Chance of firebending kid? Need full family history.



**Haru**

Pros:

  1. Earthbender—raises probability of earthbender kid.
  2. Emotionally stable
  3. Reasonably attractive (so I'm told)



Cons:

  1. Kind of boring?



**Teo**

Pros:

  1. Smart
  2. Adaptable
  3. Earth Kingdom heritage—ask about earthbenders in family
  4. Also reasonably attractive



Cons:

  1. Extent of spine injury unknown. Might not even be a possibility.
  2. Father's survival instincts somewhat worrying.



**Author's Note:**

> Suggested additional names welcome.


End file.
